Igitur non dormiamus sicut ceteri.

On Being A Man (CCD Style)

A good friend of mine referred me to Joe Carter’s short piece on the ‘50 Things a Man Should Be Able To Do‘ which I found many points to agree with (Forgiving your parents) and a not a few that left me more than a little curious.  However, #28 was one that made me want to stand and cheer for the simple fact that is a point that is often ignored, “28. Make a plan for the first 24 hours after a zombie apocalypse—Sounds silly but you’d be surprised how much you can learn about yourself by thinking through unlikely scenarios.”  Bravo, Mr. Carter, Brovo!

One of the first things I do when I move to a new place is try to figure out what I would do in the first hours of zombies.  I also find that the zombie preparation keeps me prepared for other disasters such as rioting, revolution, terrorism, and hurricanes.  Unfortunately, now that I am a resident-alien of Chicago for at least another year, I do not know if it is at all possible for me to come up with a fool-proof scenario that will keep me intact, both in soul and body.  The hope I usually ride on is the resilience and pride of the South Side in dealing with most situations and hope that I can run fast enough and swim far enough to make it to a boat on Lake Michigan.  I have also tried to assess which of the great gothic buildings on the UChicago campus could hold off hungry ex-scholars-turned-zombies.  I had thought about the Chapel, with its thick foundation, lack of ground-level windows, large tower, and thick doors, but have found that too many entrances make it likely that it will be besieged.  Any suggestions that a reader might have would be greatly appreciated.

On another note, I would amend Mr. Carter’s list with the following:

  1. Knowing how to tie several knots, including for a tie and a bow tie.  Tie knots are not just fashionable and project an aura of respect and competence, they are also practically applicable to other situations where tying a knot is necessary for survival.  Such as a rope to hang your food on or a booby-trap for sneaking zombies.
  2. Be able to have friends of various points of view.  Chesterton embodied this point quite well;  while he was very unmoving in his principles he nevertheless had friends of various ideas and viewpoints whom he loved and who also spoke well of him after his death.  Besides, life gets rather dull when you only surround yourself with people who agree with you.
  3. Recite a favorite poem.  Ok, maybe this one is mine and mine alone.
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One response

  1. manscaper

    I just started a blog dealing with this idea of the things a man MUST be able to do to be considered a “man” instead of a “guy”. I love the idea of the zombie escape plan and the need for different viewpoints and will add it to my Manliness Checklist immediately.

    I don’t know what it is about zombies that makes them so fun to plan against…perhaps its because they are a monster we believe we can overcome. It’s no fun planning your survival against vampires or werewolves. If they want you, you’re toast. With some good planning, however, fighting off zombies might actually be entertaining.

    Check me out at http://manscapingmylife.wordpress.com/

    Like

    24 July, 2010 at 12:17 am